Yes, the rumors are true. Something new has come into my life. Frankly, I didn’t think it would be that big of a deal. I certainly didn’t expect the interhoo to explode1.

But, yes. It arrived this morning. Like all good, decent, modern people, the first thing I do in the morning is check my phone. I wonder why the screen is all wonky. Then I remember I can’t see and put on my glasses. Then I check my phone again. And there it was in huge letters. The announcement. The impending arrival. It was beautiful.

I know this is hard to believe, but it happened. I got a new UPC cable modem! I was shocked, too. I only called them to try and get them to lower my bill by 50 CZK2 a few days ago. I succeeded and on top of that got a new modem with… wait for it… WIFI! Boo-yah and welcome to the big leagues, baby!

No, it isn't a cheese grater. No, I didn’t get a fly new speaker.

As an added bonus, the modem comes with a weird form of old-timey media that is doubly-unreadable. As you may know, I don’t really speak Czech, therefore, reading the label is right out. But I also no longer own an optical reader, therefore reading the content is also right out.

Worst. Gift. Evar. Save 10 CZK and stop distributing this!

In other news, you may also have heard that I am going to be the next Fedora Community Action and Impact Coordinator. I am super-excited to be taking on this new challenge and can’t wait to get started on 3 October. I’ll write more about it later. If you’re going to be around LinuxCon EU in Berlin, stop and say ‘hi.’

What about the cake?

Oh yeah, about the cake. The new role’s title is quite a mouthful. I don’t really know what to do about it other than to abbreviate it. That makes it FCAIC. I am choosing to pronounce it as F-cake. I love my new role and I love dessert3. I get to have my “cake” and eat it too!

PS: If you’re wondering why these pictures are rotated, you’re not alone. Something in the CSS seems to be doing it, so perhaps one day I’ll go find it. PRs are welcome :).

PPS: It wasn’t the CSS! It turns out that images can be rotated in two different ways. The web browsers want one way and the program did the other. sigh (added 26 July 2018)

  1. For very specific definitions of ‘explode.’ 

  2. OK, in reality I called them over a week ago and got told that no one speaks English and that I’d be called back. Then I submitted a webform and answered emails. Then I got a call in halting English and the 50 CZK discount. Then I got another call in Czech from a very nervous woman trying to get me to understand I had to be home to get the new modem. 

  3. I would love some soft-batch chocolate chip cookies right now. I miss those!